We are such children

Learning to put on shoes
can teach other life lessons also.

Yesterday, I was watching a 2yr old for an hour while his mother got some work done. He was a delightful chunk of a little boy but when our time was up and he knew "mama" could be his again, he just couldn't contain himself. He wanted and needed attention so desperately while we talked for a little while. As his frustration ramped up, when we were not 100% attentive, he resorted to fussing, biting and pulling hair.

His mother and I tried to wrap things up recognizing it might be time for a nap. We had been discussing a very dysfunctional situation and so we sat down and prayed together about it. Meanwhile, the little boy decided that it was time to put on his little tennis shoes with the Velcro fasteners. So he proceeded to try various wrong ways happily but at the point where he couldn't make it work he'd look up and start to fuss but refused help and pushed away all attempts. He wanted to put the shoe on backwards because it had some sporting balls on it that he wanted to admire while putting it on... but being backwards obviously didn't work and showing him the right way or trying to do it for him only increased his frustration. As you can probably guess this cycle ended in screaming and tears.

I couldn't help but smile.

We are so like that with God! We want a good end result but we want to get to it our way. Pushing away every attempt other people or God makes to assist us, we want it this one specific way no matter how much it will not work that way. God is forced to let us figure this out and when we do finally realize that it won't work... we scream and cry to him wondering why this is happening to us and why all our work is fruitless and messed up.

"Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” (Luke 18:17 NKJV)

I take comfort in this because I know that kids are messy, they make mistakes, they love unabashedly, and come in humility to the only one who can make it all better. That's where I want to be... and that's why I smile at a screaming child because I see them like God must see me. Tears streaming down my face, one shoe on and the other tossed across the room while I aim my face up at him and melt into my feelings knowing he can take it and make it right. It's so true, we are such children.

Blessings in Gods Timing

Believe it or not, we are still in the process of renovating the condo we bought in December.

We’ve torn down part of a wall, reframed the closet, sheetrock, drywall, retexture, etc.
Lots and lots of putty, spackle, sanding, caulking, and painting later… we are in the process of having closet organizer and laundry room shelving put in and some of the trim updated with a craftsman style for the tops of the doors. More painting to come and then carpet. I have stopped putting a time-frame on it because it keeps being changed/updated. Doing everything with cash on hand, negotiating and trading favors so it is coming along slowly. But at least we aren’t going into debt any deeper in the process.
Jonathan has been under a lot of stress from work and I'm sure renovating doesn’t make it better…so he has developed a few blood clots for no known reason and we are sitting in March now with a nearly empty Healthcare Savings Account (HSA), we’ve fully met our deductible for health insurance and the ER hasn’t even billed us yet. But thanks to having gone through the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University a few years back, we still have our emergency fund to fall back on.
So we are taking baby steps and I’m not pushing it on the time-frame. Occasionally friends come and help us make some big hurdles on the place and Jonathan will play lifeguard/babysitter at the pool while the parents work with me. That indoor pool has been such a blessing!
We’ll let you know when it’s all finished and you can come take a “tour”. ;)

Joy? What is that all about?

Reading John 15, I feel so loved every time I go through it. It speaks to the type of relationship we all are privileged to have if we continually seek and stay connected with the One and only true way -- Jesus Christ.

Struggling with a sudden attack of fear that plagued me for a good 10 minutes for absolutely no reason in the middle of the night, I prayed for freedom from these fears. God cast out all doubt and fear and gave me another few hours of sound sleep. 

Then this morning my mind returned to my brief visit with a friend yesterday. I only spent a few minutes with this person and knew they were a truly tortured soul -- it was discouraging to see this because I know that this person seeks God. I know we all go through peaks and valleys -- but this was on another level. Why couldn't they accept the assurance that they had prayed and God would take care of it? I couldn't understand it. They couldn't stop talking about all the horrible destructive points of a situation with one of their friends and how angry they were about how the person in the situation was dealing with it. There was a belief that they would have to battle (in the spiritual realm) continuously just to keep someone else from rejecting the salvation God has given. There were lots of other factors but my point was that we can't manage anyone else's relationship with God, only our own. And whenever we try, boy, do we make a mess of things! Yes, intercede in prayer for one another, but lift one another up! Words have such power! Thinking of how distraught my friend was over all these things and how there always seems to be some drama going on in someone else's life that has them all concerned... I was struck by the concept (and mother's will get defensive at this point) that we really shouldn't measure our love for one another by how much we worry over their lives. I wanted happiness, love and restoration for my fellow believers; so my mind was flooded with verses about "the joy of our salvation" and "Cast your cares on the Lord for he cares for you...." and on and on about joy and reassurance. My face quickly reflected the relief and excitement that I felt; a grin spread across my face, a little giggle bubbled up in my throat, and tears came to my eyes. When I could see clearly enough, I jotted each one down as fast as they had come and looked them up.

At first, "Rejoice and be exceedingly glad...", I wrote off as just more of the 'joy' verses until I looked it up. But Jesus was speaking the Sermon on the Mount and these were his parting words: “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you." Matthew 5:12 ESV

This made me think of the terrible words that had been said between my friends in anger and frustration and I was comforted that God would work it out.

Do we fully comprehend just how much God loves us? Didn't his death and resurrection scream "I love you" across nations and generations? I challenge you to get into the Word and know who God is more fully. He is love and he has promised in John 15:7,9 -- "If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. (9) As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love."

"No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for  all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you." John 15:15 ESV

He is my comfort and my strength! Over and over he urges me in his Word "don't worry", "do not fear", "do not be anxious for anything". My God is faithful and he will finish the work he has begun in each of us.